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The job market is terrible. Anyone need a writer?

I wrecked my car down here before I even made it to the hotel. Whats up with that? Sorry Floridians, but most of you are horrible drivers.
I’ve already become bored with Universal and Disney… I guess I move to Seaworld next?

I WANNA SEE THE PENGUINS!

Its kind of creepy moving somewhere and not knowing whats in store for you. I’ve lived in the same city for 23 years and now I venture into “the real world”. If you stop and think about it, it is a weird notion. Leaving behind all your friends and family to pursue a life of your own. I am sure everyone has already been through this, but now its my turn and I plan to venture full force into it like the enterprise into warp speed.

Who has two thumbs and is moving to Orlando? This guy right here!

Let’s all go to Disney World!

Get out and vote today if your in a primary state! It’s kind of important.

Eon gave me a blog. You know what that means? That means your going to get a faceful of my personality, coming at you like a Peter North pop shot. I will be speaking my mind freely and I urge you to consume these tidbits with an open mind. If you do not share my thoughts, feel free to tell me as I love a good argument.

I leave you today with a few thoughts

- I find pro-wrestling to be more realistic than any presidential debate.

- I have Ohio, the weather sucks and a majority of the people are very closed-minded.

- I will hold my tongue in a public forum, because I can’t stand arguing with people who refuse to lose an argument, no matter how wrong they are.

- I do not believe in the term “GILF”, because it’s just plain wrong. Grandmas are for hugs and cookies, not for fucking.

- I believe women deserve to be treated with respect and dignity, unless you are currently engaging in a sexual act and she enjoys otherwise.

- Unless otherwise noted, i think you should always ask before trying anal.

- I think America’s greatest enemy is Disney, not Iran or North Korea.

- I am, have been and always will be dryly humored, sarcastic and constantly misunderstood.

- I hate strip clubs and porn stores because I cannot stand men who objectify women. I strongly believe pornstars are people too and they are pretty damn awesome if you get to know um.

- I am one of those nice, coy, shy nerdy types who also happen to be a sex and porn addict.

- I say FUCK a lot.

END.

So, I think I might start my own religion, just so I can build a church and then expand it for no reason. That seems to be the trend here in Ohio. Every church on every corner is adding on. The funny part is I don’t know a single person who GOES to church.

Fonz be with you.
and with you.
now sit on it.
aeeeeeeeeeeeeee!